The truth about Daygaming

Dating trends keep evolving with new techniques and some of them are just downright stupid. Here’s a thought on the Daygaming trend
Words Yvonne Jacob

With Twitter and Instagram getting flooded with news about the Boys Locker Room, everyone is self-evaluating themselves and going over tiny things that we felt were okay, but actually aren’t. Similarly, we take a closer look at a popular dating trend that rose to fame before the lockdown and I’ll tell you why it’s actually a senseless trend to follow. First off, I like to believe that the concept of Daygaming was cooked up by some boy in his mid twenties, who spends his weekends in his basement watching some illogical romantic movie with a bag of pretzels for company. If you’ve seen the movie Hitch starring Will Smith and Eva Mendes then you must also know about the concept of a dating consultant or a coach. He is someone who helps men who aren’t great with their approach to women they are attracted to or just introverts who need some advice and ideas. While this is passable under the assumption that the advice passed on is for genuine reasons minus any negative motives, Daygaming is something that just doesn’t make sense to me.

What is Daygaming?

According to a Daygaming website where men can actually sign up for their tips and tricks, “Daygame is the art of meeting and attracting amazing women without going to nightclubs. It could be while you’re walking down the street, in a clothing store, at the train station. It usually happens during the day, hence why it’s called Daygame.” Quite simple till here right? But that’s not it, there’s more, much  more. “The reason Daygame works so well is because it bypasses the negative response a beautiful woman would usually have if you tried to talk to her in a nightclub. When women go to nightclubs, they expect to be hit on. They get approached by drunk guys all night so they’ve had to learn to put up a shield. This shield makes it really difficult to get a great girl to like you.” Umm, yeah! If you’re going to be standing in a corner and creepily staring at a woman constantly, it’s just going to freak her out. Maybe she’s just out to have a fun night with the girls or she’s just catching a break, under these circumstances, tough luck! But hold on, that wasn’t even the best bit. The website also has a wise and thoughtful thing on it, “ When you strike up a conversation with a woman during the day, you create a situation she’s been fantasising about her entire life. The reason women watch romantic comedies and read romantic fiction novels is because it plays into their fantasy of how they’ll meet the guy of their dreams.” Ding ding ding! We have a loser. And the number of thoughts put into this would be 0, clearly. 

Women don’t watch romantic movies because they’re expecting Richard Gere to randomly show up in a limo and say, “Hey! I love you.” And to get a few other things out of the way, there’s no filmy bumping into each other and bending down to pick up her books or whatever or an orchestra playing in her head when she happened to make eye contact with you for a fraction of a second. We don’t walk down the street expecting to meet McCreepy pretending to be McDreamy. We know where the line between reality and fantasy lies.


Do it right or don’t do it at all

While the strategy of approaching a woman without being under the influence of alcohol does show potential, it all lies in the way you talk to her. First of all, you don’t know if she’s waiting for a friend or a boyfriend or better yet, her husband. You don’t want that kind of hell unleashing on you. Most men use Daygaming for what it is, a game, and they do keep score. If you’re going to treat it like a sport, you might as well invest your time learning a real sport, try catch for starters maybe? 

If you genuinely are attracted to a woman and you want to get to know her, do try talking. And know how to access a situation that doesn’t make her awkward. We can tell the difference between a genuine attempt and a fake, pretentious one. So yes, the genuine guys WILL get a genuine response. As for the ones who just want to have some “fun”, I hope you have fast reflexes and see that bag being flung towards your face.